Seria 3

All about successfull Dunking sau Cum sa-ti inmoi biscuitii in cafea fara sa se rupa

Va vorbesc ca urmare a unei emisiuni revelatoare pe care am vazut-o in dimineata asta pe National Geographic. Un om de stiinta a inceput sa analizeze la cati Newtoni rezista un biscuite uscat in comparatie cu unul inmuiat. A ajuns la concluzia ca daca e uscat suporta greutatea a 3 mere, iar daca e umezit nu suporta nici macar greutatea unui mar. Logic, veti spune. Insa...
La cronometrarea inmuierii perfecte, a descoperit ca daca ii inmoi 2 secunde, sunt inca prea tari, iar daca ii inmoi 4 secunde sunt deja prea moi.
Solutia ingenioasa a omului de stiinta a fost ca trebuie sa inmuiem biscuitii la un grad cat mai mic fata de suprafata lichidului. Astfel, biscuitele se va patrunde doar pe o parte, luandu-i mai mult timp sa se inmoaie de tot... si eventualele pierderi sunt cu mult reduse.

Cherchez l'homme

Doctorii au ajuns la concluzia ca, daca gasesti figura umana in 3 secunde, atunci emisfera dreapta a creierului tau este mai bine dezvoltata decat la majoritatea oamenilor.

Daca gasesti figura umana intre 3 secunde si un minut, atunci emisfera dreapta este dezvoltata normal.

Daca gasesti figura umana intre un minut si 3 minute, atunci emisfera dreapta a creierului tau functioneaza prea incet si ai nevoie sa mananci mai multe proteine.

Daca nu ai gasit figura umana nici dupa 3 minute, naspa de tine.

Omul e acolo. Mai uita-te o data.

That's not a Porch...

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.

"Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"
The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."

Hopa...

Test de personalitate.

Un test la fel de dureros precum horoscopul de ieri.

http://www.shapetest.com

That's mean! :D

Eu nu mai am scapare.

Diagnostic Overview:
Your responses indicate that you're basically normal, except for your obsession with sheep and running naked in the moonlight. Electroshock therapy might help; taking foolish inkblot tests on the internet sure as hell won't. Get a hobby (one not involving sheep) and try to keep your twisted impulses under control. People who answer as you did are almost always crack addicts or sleazy porn film extras.

Long-Term Prognosis:
You will need intensive psychological care for the rest of your life because of the factors described above. Stay away from other people if at all possible; just use the internet. Don't go outdoors or you're doomed. You are deeply scared of anything dangerous, violent, or threatening, which actually makes perfect sense, now that we think about it.

Additional Fears:
You're also afraid of cats, toasters, and the doorbell. This is silly- when was the last time the doorbell caused you any harm?

Accident incredibil.

Deci accidentul s-a intamplat in felul urmator. Eu conduceam un Mertan si voiam sa dau inapoi. Lampa de marsalier era aprinsa si prin teava de esapament iesea fum. In spatele masinii mele se afla un stalp probabil rau intentionat, deoarece vazand manevra mea nu a luat nicio masura de precautie. Deci Mertanu' meu facea WUUMMM... si deodata BAU !!! TROSC-PLEOSC. Eu, mirat la auzul bubuielii, ma dau jos si cand ma uit... ce sa vad? Tripla belita.
Solicit despagubiri.
(Acest text este un pamflet; eventualele greseli nu imi apartin, desi textul l-am redactat eu. A se citi desenul.)